Love and Fear



What do you feel when you look up to the sky?

When we look up at, and think about the sky and space, or even heaven or the Universe, we can have a mix of feelings ranging from love to fear. I often look to the sky and the beyond and feel calm and wonderment and feelings of connection and belonging. On the other hand, I also think of the expanding Universe and have thoughts of the eternal, and I feel unnerved, disconnected, and disoriented.

Only 2 emotions

I believe there are only two emotions that we operate out of: Love and Fear. All of our labeled emotions that are positive, like joy, peace, wonder, hope, and happiness are all feelings of Love. All of our labeled emotions that are negative, like anger, resentment, guilt, sadness, and anxiety are all feelings of Fear.

Embracing this notion can have huge implications for our wellness.

Fear is arguably the largest roadblock to wellness. Our insecurities sit within fear.

We have to love ourselves completely, unquestionably in order to be empowered to embrace our wellness as a non-negotiable.

If there are things we don’t like about ourselves, we will likely feel we don’t deserve to take care of ourselves, even if this is subconscious. If we are judging our ‘human doingness’ and fearful that we just aren’t measuring up, we aren’t producing enough, will we then be apt to engage in self-care activities? Unlikely. When we compare ourselves to others in any number of the ways we do; body image, skin color, hair texture, country of origin, accent, job description, accolades, education, etc…, how then can we love ourselves enough to say: I am worth it. I am worth taking care of. I am worth loving. I have unique skills and gifts and contributions to make in the world, and I cannot do them unless I am at my best. I cannot be at my best if I am not taking care of myself.

Getting quiet

The second piece of fear being the biggest roadblock is fear of getting quiet enough to realize all the fear. When we get quiet and we ask ourselves what we need, so that we can engage in self-care activities, we have to be willing to hear the answers. Those answers are often riddled with fear. We may realize there are a number of things we are doing that don’t fit for us, like a relationship or a job. We may realize we are not doing a number of things that we want to and know would be good for us, like eating well or moving more.

What are your fears?

As part of a sustainable self-care plan, it’s important to note your fears. What are they? Where do they come from? You may have to dig deep to discover some that you have hidden really well. We can’t live our lives without fear. It will continue to show up. But…we can certainly face our fears and make the decision to live in love as often as possible.

If you want to be well and you want to embrace self-care, you have to love yourself first. Loving yourself also entails facing your fears. How will you do this?


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